Changeable as the moon

I live by many rules and made-up laws and I break them more often than not. Some are silly but some are rather serious. I can't even remember when I swore off men, but I clearly did. I cast them out of my life, sometimes consciously, sometimes without really realizing what was happening. I have so often been a fool. But we know these things, yes? It's no surprise, I hope. I formally strike this policy of mine from my code of law.

I'm so rediculous that it's one of the great marvels of my life that I have been able to hang onto anyone.

I think about the dream of the horse and wolf a lot, and think about what it means. I think I realized that it seemed sexual, and wondered if I made the (very traditional) association of men and wolves. "I was sure I was going to die."

2002-10-08, changeable as the moon

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